For WCIS, This Is Your Drunken USA Halftime Recap

At the moment, it is the 22nd minute of the Team USA Epic Fail in San Jose (the non-American San Jose). So far it has been a clusterfuck of defensive mistakes and a massively ineffective 4-3-3 formation. I know, I know, the US hasn't done anything in Costa Rica in a long time, but still, this was a whole lot like Dave Chapelle's failure to show up for the third season of his own show.

The first goal was a nice strike after a defender fell down and had no support from teammates outside the 18 yard box, but the second goal was a heaping pile of USA FAIL. Costa Rica gets far too free down their left flank, our young defenders overcommit to that side like teeball fielders chasing a baseball, and for some reason Timmy Howard is way the fuck off his line (think Goldberg from the "Mighty Ducks" movies). Again, there's a little credit to the Costa Rican fans, who are insanely loud and right on top of the pitch, which is undoubtedly what led to some of the miscommunication between Timmy Howard and his defensive back line, but, seriously, Bob Bradley? You can't simulate crowd noise somehow in your training sessions? (Side note: maybe you can't, I don't know shit about how the team trains, I'm currently just being a drunken pissed off asshole watching the game and rant-typing because I felt the impulse)

As a final note, I'd like to thank ESPN's resident soccer fucktard Eric Wynalda for suggesting at halftime that, because they came back from 2-0 down to draw against El Salvador, the USMNT could do the same against Costa Rica. Congratulations on not being able to recognize the difference between a middling CONCACAF side that doesn't deserve much respect, and a CONCACAF side that should be beside the USA and Mexico as near-locks for the World Cup every four years.

/end drunken rant
//hopes to claim credit for any reverse-jinxing second half production
///Prove me wrong, USMNT...PROVE ME WRONG