He's a Fancy Boy

/near Manchester Airport

/driver flops out of car

/summons fake tears, motions for the stretcher

/looks up, searches for eye contact with referee

/briefly worries that his favorite hookers are concerned by his Oscar-worthy performance

/still searching for referee, hoping to milk a yellow card

/can't find referee

/realizes he's not playing soccer

/stands up

/metrosexually prances out of tunnel